Both Husband And Wife Should Exercise Patience

Scholars throughout the ages are unanimous that Hazrat Luqmaan was an extremely wise man. In fact, some are of the opinion that he was a prophet. He was once working in an orchard when the owner of the orchard asked him to bring a cucumber. After peeling the cucumber, the owner sliced it and gave to Hazrat Luqmaan slice by slice to eat. Hazrat Luqmaan ate every slice with relish. Seeing the enjoyment on Hazrat Luqmaan's face the owner decided to eat the last slice himself. However, the taste was so bitter that he instantly spat it out. 

"This tastes worse than poison, yet you were eating it with so much relish!" exclaimed the owner. "That's true," replied Hazrat Luqmaan. "Why did you not tell me that it is so bitter?" queried the owner. "Why should I complain," replied Hazrat Luqmaan "when the same hand that always feeds me delicious food once gives me something bitter to eat?"

After relating this incident, Maulana Ashraf Ali Thanwi r.a. comments that there will be no disputes between husband and wife if both remember the above rule. If the wife thinks that since her husband is always towards her. At the same time, she should bear in mind that there are many times when he had to overlook things that she did. It is foolish to forget a lifetime of favours merely because of a single annoyance or scolding. Because of a single error on the husband's part, the wife should not blurt whatever she pleases by saying that she has only known hardship after marriage and would be better off dead. Such statements are unfortunately very common and should be avoided at all costs.

By the same token, husbands should remember that their wives do everything to serve them and should not be scolded merely because she once slipped up or did not do as desired. It is therefore imperative for both husband and wife to remember this principle that Hazrat Luqmaan demonstrated. 

excerpt from "A gift for Muslim Bride"